This event occurred on 13 Oct 2014 at around 10:00 PM (PST).
I was awakened by dirty socks and a broken door frame…
At the moment of my awakening, this was my truth: “The only real answer is love. Love for myself and love for the world”.
As this beautiful and wondrous moment unfolded, these are the words that appeared on the page in front of me:
The only real answer is love. Love for myself and love for the world.
to love this page
to love this notebook
to love this pen
to love these words
to love all that i am
to love all that i have
to TRULY love all those who have given me this immense gift
to thank the Buddha and all of his students
to thank the Christ
to thank all those true of heart and clear of mind
to love the broken bathroom doorframe
to love my rage – to TRULY love my rage
– my rage drove me to this place
– my rage gave me the gift of this place
AND TO [SO], who is such a wondrous, glowing and radiant human being with so much love of her own to share
To her I owe so much
To them all I owe so much
and thank you cushion…
There was no mistaking this moment for me. It was pure and true and cannot be expressed in words. It was love – and that is all.
My words continued to appear in random parts of my notebook for another several minutes. These are a few of them:
I am filled with a tremendous sense of appreciation for being given the opportunity to love…
this is my joy
THIS IS MY JOY!
to love Byron Katie for her story just when I needed it… just those few words.
I love myself fully
My life forward …to be of service and just help them find some degree of comfort
Sleeping in the dirt and being uncomfortable makes little sense… lets go somewhere we can truly enjoy this wondrous opportunity to be alive. Tomorrow is okay.
For that last one, I’d just planned, earlier that night, to spend 2 nights in the woods, during a fair bit of nasty weather. I wanted some alone time. I told myself there were better ways that made more sense.
This next bit was interesting. It came to me during this period as I was considering what was next for my narcissism:
A List: “Be Careful This Trap”
The trap of complacency – End of list
but there is actually more to this
*The faulty behavior: These are just conditioned impulses. Watch and question them when they arise.
*The trap of hubris [added later]
There are other words on these pages as well, but they are for me. I am just so happy to have found my truth and my joy. To have also experienced a clear mind – a truly clear and empty mind. To shine the light within it and to find it completely vacant. What a tremendously wonderful and life changing gift!.
This is my truth.